Thursday, July 05, 2007

Why?

I realised only a few days ago that a chinese cluster mate of mine, living two rooms away from mine, is also interning where I am (IBN). I happened to see her in the Biopolis shuttle bus a few times and also in the lift at IBN. I'm pretty sure that by now, even she has realised the same thing. [Unless of course, she is totally oblivious to her surroundings! She actually helped me with a little problem I had with my lens one day just before I was leaving for work, so she's definitely seen me around!But at that time I didn't know she was interning at IBN too.]

We live in the same cluster, go to work at the same place and travel by the same bus everyday. And yet, we haven't said a 'hi' to each other or even smiled at each other! At one of our safety briefings, she was sitting in front of me, and when she turned around a couple of times and saw me, I thought I'd tell her that she was my cluster mate, but her face was totally expressionless and her body language seemed to indicate that she was not interested. So I decided against it. It's been a while now, and we still haven't spoken to each other.. I wonder why..

Is it because we are clannish and don't really like to mingle with other kinds of people?
Or is it because we have too many friends anyway and so we don't need another one?
Or we have our iPod's to keep us company on the way to work..who wants a person to talk to?
Or we just don't care about our neighbours, sometimes we don't even know who they are!
Or may be, we're just not the friendly-and-mingling-type anymore?

11 comments:

Mithr said...

We are a little clannish. Agreed
We do bother about our neighbours- it entirely depends on how interesting and welcoming they are. You meet a cluster mate who loves her culture and at the same time wants to do what you do, you would get friendly at the first meeting. It is just the willingness to learn about others' that matters. Maybe this girl is one who is not very outgoing . Why don't you start a conversation in the life ? something like " hey, Haven't we met somewhere?" or " hi. you seem familiar!" . Hehe

Mithr said...

sorry correction in the last but third line " Why don't you start a conversation in the lifT ?"

Confused Soul said...

Haha.. I was just thinking that I'll start a conversation sometime and then, depending on how things go, blog about that experience too! :P

Anusha said...

I really think both parties have to seem inviting for a decent conversation to take place. I know how awkward it feels to be the one doing all the smiling and the talking and the yabbering, while the other person just calmly watches on (or worse, just ignores you). I would recommend giving a conversation a try, like mithr suggested, but if you don't get a decent response, my best advice? Don't bother.

Yup, I'm a hard-ass. ;)

Macho Girl said...

happens all the time i suppose. In my cluster, during my first year, there was this weird girl who used to lock herself in her room and just play the cello. When we bumped into each other, she also pretty much ignored me. Then i decided to do something and I told her the next time i met her that I thought she was brilliant at the cello. She didnt say anything much. Just a "get away from me you freak!" sort of a look then a curt thanks and she walked off. I decided not to approach her again. But that very evening, after i came back from classes, i found a note slipped under my door. It was an invitation to a concert at the esplanade and a small post-it note saying "Hi, i guess you are out, i tried knocking a few times. Anyway, I am performing at the esplanade with my group. Sorry I couldnt get complimentary tickets. I think you will find the show interesting :)" All it took to break the ice was a little chit chat in the bathroom :)

And oh, another clustermate of mine, from that same cluster (whom i thought was a b**** in my first year coz she never talked to anyone and was sorta "cold"), met me on the bus and we had a great convo! We smile at each other these days when we meet.

Just need to break the ice dahling! :)

Confused Soul said...

#Clueless and MG,

As I said to Mithr, I'm definitely gonna strike a conversation with her, but I thought I'd blog about the present scenario before that.. :)

Siddharth said...

Do one thing... Leave ur blog address at her doorsteps.. see what happens next...lol!
I think u should (as u are anyways going to)start a conversation n may be u'll get the answer only after knowing her reaction to ur first step..Your questions ask about 'we' which includes that girl also..So I guess it'll be wrong to come to a conclusion before actually understanding what does she thinks of the situation and how she reacts to it...
Whatsay?

Confused Soul said...

#Sid,
Haha.. I guess I should just give her a piece of paper with my blog address on it :P That'll be fun! And anyway they say that it's easier to express something in words that you can't tell the person on his/her face.. So it's not a bad idea actually..

The most funny part would be if she is actually oblivious to her surroundings and she didn't realise that she was ignoring me!

Will let you know what happens when I talk to her..I'll have to do that soon though, moving out of pgp very soon!

Quarter Past Seven said...

I'll tell you. first of all, spoil your eyesight, then refuse to wear glasses. Pretty soon you'll be smiling at every girl, boy or dog who comes your way.. :D works for me! I am now friends with the KFC delivery guy who comes to my office coz when I saw him from a distance, I thought he was one of my collegues..talk about anti-adventures!

Anonymous said...

hahahaha hmmm have u talked to her yet?? =D

Confused Soul said...

#Bart,

LOL! I'd rather just go talk to her, than spoling my eyesight for life ;)

#Shankar,

Haven't bumped into her since, when I do, I'll talk to her :)